When I was about 8 years old, I had a period where I loved to pee on the toilet with my panties on. I did this before taking a bath, so that I could go into the bath with the panties on and they wouldn’t smell like pee when my mother found them. The feeling of wetting the panties, and sometimes also other clothes, is also something that still turns me on a bit. I don’t know how often I have done this, but I know I stopped doing it that much, because it was very messy sometimes, because I couldn’t really control where the pee went. When I was really enjoying the pantywetting it would run down my legs and wet the toiletseat and the floor and it would feel too good to stop. Cleaning it up, without getting my parants suspicious, wasn’t easy.
A few years later (I still did the pantywetting on the toilet sometimes) I tried something new for the first time. I was taking a bath and I was lying on my back and I put my legs up in the air, over my head. Then I tried to pee with a stream strong enough to hit my face. That’s how I got peed in the face for the first time and it felt really nice.
It didn’t have the thrill of being very forbitten though. Thats why I also started doing something else around that age. I wet my panties a tiny bit sometimes in the middle of situations with others around me. This gave me a really nice feeling, with shame and excitement. As I got older, I got into puberty and also got a menstrual cycle. Now I was using poise pads sometimes and they gave me a chance to pee more without other people noticing. I especially liked, and still like, thinking to myself that I am going to pee only a very little drop, knowing that I will pee more, because it will feel so nice. That moment where I go over my own limit, by peeing “too much” feels so nice. I get scared that others might notice the pee and then I get scared that they notice me being scared. I loved to do this at the dinnertable when I was about 13 years old. At home with just panties and pants. I remember how I went to the toilet afterwards, feeling so afraid that my parents or brother would see a stain in my pants, because I thought I had definitely peed too much. The relief of seeing that the pee hadn’t come all the way trough the jeans was always huge and it felt very nice to keep wearing the peed pants and panties afterwards. I also remember one time wetting a poise pad at the dinnertable with my first boyfriend and his parents. I had decided that I could pee just a very little bit. I felt so naughty doing that, that it really made me want to pee a little bit more and then just one bit more, with a bit more power, so that it would be a little stream and not just a drop. I could feel it getting wet all around my vagina. I was so afraid about how my pants might be wet when I got up, but I couldn’t get up yet, we were still eating. And the poise pad sucked up all the pee it started to feel dryer. This made me believe that I hadn’t peed too much after all. And still all excited because of the thrill, I peed a bit again. The poise pad sucked it up again and I peed a bit more. The pad sucked it up again. All the peeing in little bits had really made me need to pee. I thought I could pee just one little bit more, but then… I couldn’t control how much came out as good as before. I peed much more than I intented to and the pad didn’t suck it all up. I set at the table feeling the wettness around my vagina and ass the rest of the dinner. I got so afraid and ashamed, that it turned me off a bit. But I didn’t want to give into that. I wanted to go back to the nice feeling from before. I decided to pee a little bit more, as I was almost certain that the pee would be showing after getting up anyways. I peed and I could feel how a small puddle of pee developed on the completely saturated pad. Shortly after that, everyone had finished eating and I went to the toilet as fast as I could, looking down to the floor because my face felt as if it was as red as a tomato, I thought my chair was probably wet, but I didn’t take any time to look at it, as I wanted to get out of the room while the others were still busy with cleaning up the table so that they maybe wouldn’t look at me. At the toilet I first had to breathe. When I took my pants down, I found out that it wasn’t that bad after all. The pad was competely soaked of course, but the jeans hadn’t really let the pee through. There was only a very little spot, that you wouldn’t see if you didn’t look for it. Still, I felt very ashamed about not being able to control my own behavior out of hornyness.
The panty peeing was something I did for years. I also wanted to pee a bit in my panties in the classroom in highschool. I tried lots of times, but I never really did. I couldn’t do it without showing it in my face. And when I thought others could see, I didn’t have the courage to go through with it. I did do it one time later in college though. I still do it sometimes. (Actually, writing about it makes me so excited about it, that I have been peeing little bits while writing this. It feels so nice, I’m peeing more and more…) The only thing is, that now at home, there is no reason for me to be ashamed when I wet myself and in other situations I’m mostely with my baby, beeing a mother. I don’t feel like doing horny things when I’m in my motherrole.
That is why I like making clips and selling them in my store so much, because there are people watching me then, so I do have reason to be ashamed (the “being a whore” selling myself for money part is also something that really turns me on, probably for the same reason.) On the other hand I feel like the visitors of my store are my friends and they understand my fetish, just like you, reading this. That also gives me a nice feeling, sharing my intimate excitement.
When I peed on camera for the first time, I still was a high school girl. I was home alone one night and I was in a horny and experimental mood (writing this, I’m sitting in a big puddle of pee already ). I knew how to get to a sexchat on the computer and that was what I wanted to do. I put on some sexy lingery (using my mothers closet to complete my outfit) and I positioned the webcam so that it wouldn’t show my face. I started a chat with someone, didn’t type or say anything, just stood there in front of the camera and started to finger myself. First with one, then with two fingers quite rough and while I had my fingers in my vagina I started peeing. I felt like this was my chance to do it and I had to use that chance. I peed a big stream, just let it all splash on the floor, where it created a big puddle. The reaction was positive and I felt really nice. I’ve never felt bad about this, but I did feel very much ashamed afterwards. I had a boyfriend at the time (that same boyfriend from the dinnertable) and I told him about fingering myself on webcam. I didn’t tell him about the peeing and I’ve never told him that. I didn’t know that much about my fetish at the time. I was much too shy and I was so ashamed of it.
Even with my next boyfriend (I was 18 years old at that time) I was too shy to say anything. Even though I thought he might like it. I thought that because one time, when we went to the beach, we had sex in the water. He was still inside me when he said “I want to pee inside you” then he laughed and acted like it was a joke (He used to do that all the time; say things, then laugh and say it was a joke and then say that it wasn’t a joke but that it was serious and then say that it was a joke again. He was sooooo annoying and I’m so glad that I’m not together with him anymore. Sorry for writing that. I just have to make sure that if he ever reads this, he doesn’t think that I like remembering having sex with him or being together with him.) This really must have not been a joke, because he even said it again. I don’t remember how I reacted, probably said nothing out of shyness, maybe I even said that he could, but then he said that it causes infection and that he’d better not do it. Although he did not do it, it made me think, but I’ve never had the courage to ask him or tell him about my fetish. Luckily I found someone I did tell about my fetish later and I have some exciting stories about things that we did together. However, I will write about that some other time, because I need to go to bed and I’m getting all cold now, sitting here in my very wet pants and panties.